We are making a Romantic FANTASY movie with a bar kuthu song in a mystical far-off world.” Get your drunken drawl of a voice ready and pen some soup-songy lyrics. No compromise,” the producer says and hangs up. “Think up whatever magical world in whatever universe you want. They both argue heatedly and come to a conclusion. And most importantly I need a plastic foil crown for the King of the magical world.” I need some kitsch going for the LOTR themes. But in return I need plastic swords and props that would make my movie look hideously cheap. Something that looks like it was born of wedlock of a dragon, a lion, a scorpion and the Hulk.” Selva, without skipping a beat, says “Yes. But I need a hugggggeeee animal in the movie. The producer after listening to Selva’s idea says, “Selva, this is path-breaking.
He immediately calls his producer who is watching Avatar on the new Blu-Ray disc (he is high as well, obviously). (Thus making it the message of the movie). He makes this the magical rule that the fantasy world will hinge on. Being the anachronistic hippie that she is, she leaves him with one last thought “Make Love not War”. The blonde woman holds his hands and takes him back to the old bar. In a hurry he clicks pictures of the place for his art director’s reference. The blonde girl who brought him here is now talking to the bearded man and Selva throws a tantrum, but somewhere in his mind a knot for a screenplay is born. (Thus the villain is born and he talks Tamil too!). When he tries to pitch the nascent idea for a fantasy movie screenplay to a white girl, a burly, grey bearded man shoves him away. He then strikes up a conversation with a quiet Zen monk and suddenly realizes the profundity of life and love in this world. He then walks through the party taking meticulous notes about the décor and the lights and phosphorescent colors. He starts a conversation in Tamil and realizes that every white man and woman in this magical, colorful world speaks Tamil. A buffet of the choicest Hallucinogens and Acid and Weed and Horse Semen and Rabbit Ears later, Selva walks through the crowd on the dance floor. This rave is the mother lode, Selva realizes and pulls out a pen and paper. (You will know by now that this is the point where a particular scene in the movie was conceived) She leads him to a dark, rusty door in an abandoned street and beckons Selva to open the door.Īs he opens the door, a blast of loud Techno music hits him in his face. Selva, strangely struck by this blonde woman’s persona, nods and follows her through a labyrinth of dark abandoned streets in a trance. A blonde, wiry woman walks up to him and says “Hello. He walks out of the back door and into the alley to take a piss. All said and done, he is as high as Mt.Kilimanjaro at this point.
Selva walks into a bar (No this is not a bar joke!) in Goa.
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